The night owl scrapped

Because I'm up in the middle of the night, I felt like being productive. I did this layout.

Sleeping is starting to improve

Last night I headed off to bed later, well after 11, but it's no point going earlier at the moment. I was up again at 2am and read some blogs and surfed the web until just after 3am, then I slept until just after 9am. It's the longest stretch of sleep I've had in nearly two weeks. To say I'm happy is an understatement. So glad I'm just persevering with these meds. I know too, that in six weeks when I have to increase my dose, I'll go through this again, but at least I know what to expect. The benefits will outweigh the inconvenience now.

My visit to my GP went well yesterday. She's just lovely, and thorough and knowledgeable. I don't feel like I'm some neurotic housewife when I talk to her. She understands what I'm feeling and has said to me this has been going on for far too long. No-one has ever said that to me before. I just felt like a weight lifted off me just to hear her say that.

I'm booked in to see a Rheumatologist at the end of June. My inflammatory markers are raised, as they are at every blood test I've ever had. I've been to two Rheumatologists before, once in 2002 and once in 1995, (the earlier visit I'd actually forgotten about, but Bunny reminded me). I'm going to see a young female specialist, not the same one I saw last time. I didn't want to see him again. I'm also booked in to see a psychologist in May. It will be good to sort out some things, and change my thought patterns. I know there's more potential within me, I want to find it. There are also some quite personal issues I'd like to sort out.

Overall I'm feeling positive about this whole process. My GP has also suggested that I could see an Exercise something or other....far out the title of this person escapes me. They are a cross between a physio and a personal trainer. He would look at my problems - shoulder and achilles and design an exercise program for me. He works from the gym where I used to attend. It's something I will keep in mind. Not working full days anymore, I can fit a gym program into my day. It would come down to affordability. I'm so aware that an aging body loses muscle mass, and I hate that.......I know weight training etc will tone me up again.

Today was a good day. It's the first day I've not struggled with staying awake in the afternoon. I did my Daisy work, and Barbi came for coffee in the afternoon which was just lovely. We talked a little about the store and a lot about other things too. I always feel she leaves my home a little lighter than she felt when she walked in. It's nice for her to take a couple of hours out in the middle of a busy day to drink coffee and relax. We are very excited because the store went live yesterday.

Billy-Joe has cooked dinner tonight. Butter Chicken, which is currently smelling delicious as it simmers away on the stove. He's getting a little more confident in the kitchen which is great. There's no way I'm rearing a child who is useless in the kitchen, thankfully all three kids enjoy helping in the kitchen, and it's something I need to continue to encourage.

Easter Monday

As a family it would be so nice if we could have more holidays. I know I'm lucky to have school holidays off with the kids, but it's so nice to have dear Bunny home too. Mind you, he's been dreadfully busy mowing half the street, (he looks after the yards of the two old ladies across the road), plus ours, so that's several hours of work, included in that, he whipper snips and prunes our garden, so it looks gorgeous. Had to have it lovely for Easter Sunday. With all the rain we've had of late, everything is looking so healthy, lush and green.

It's been so nice to just chill out together. I went outside for a bit and pottered in the garden and then threw the footy to Mickey. You always know how much stuff like that means, when you're told 'You're the best Mum in the world'. Actually I've seen a personality shift in Mickey of late, and it's for the better. He's becoming a very caring little boy. He's becoming a child who is thinking of others and not just himself. He knows I've had problems sleeping and asks me every single day how I slept. At the end of a school day he always asks me how my day was, because I always ask them. Ever since Izzy was ill, he asks after her every afternoon too. When I got up on Sunday morning, all the shoes from the front door were put away, mine were neatly placed outside my bedroom door and the mat I use at the door was straightened out neatly. Mickey had done that, without being asked. He's the one who goes outside when Bunny is doing yards, to see what he can do to help. When I was changing my medication and knew I'd be feeling a bit fragile for a bit, I told both Mickey and Billy-Joe, and they've been so sweet to me. Sammy, alas is still too egocentric, and I didn't pull him aside. He'd not understand and I don't want to scare him.

On that note, I'm amazed at how well I actually feel. I'm still not sleeping, last night I got up at 2.15am, stayed up for an hour and a quarter and then went back to bed and slept well until 8.30am. I get moments during the day where I don't think I can keep my eyes open. Sometimes I get up and do something, or else I'll just close my eyes for 15 minutes. I'm going back to my GP tomorrow, and it will be interesting what she says. I know she'll probably want to increase the dosage, as what I'm on now is the start dose.

I feel different within myself. I am quietly excited and very happy about it. I feel as though I have more patience and I'm much calmer. I don't feel like everything is a hassle or a big deal. Even though I'm not sleeping well, I get up in the morning happier than what I did before. I normally wake up on the weekend, and secretly wish I could just hibernate there all day long.....not good!

I've been busy today, the washing was huge, but it's all done and inside now. Bunny listened to the races this afternoon in between pottering in the garden with me. Billy-Joe headed down to the park for a couple of hours with some friends.

I was going to do a layout today. I've got some photos I need to edit. When I get up in the night, I've been downloading a couple of free kids. I don't do a lot of free ones, because I usually don't end up using them , but every now and again I find something that's gorgeous, I guess I've just become more choosy and I know what I like.

I'm glad I've got the next few days off. I'd like to take the kids somewhere, pity everything costs so much. They've been playing outside all afternoon which is great. So nice that it's not raining and no longer so dreadfully hot. The weather has just been gorgeous.

Easter Weekend

Yesterday morning, we headed out to see Peter's parents. We had a lovely morning. His eldest sister was there too and it was nice to see her too. After morning tea, the kids watched a movie and we sat and chatted.

When we got home just after lunch, I got the kids lunch and then prepared the food for Sunday's lunch. I'm glad I did that, it meant Sunday morning wasn't frantic. I laid down in the afternoon with some music. I didn't sleep, but enjoyed the rest. I'm still not sleeping well at night, so by mid afternoon, I hit a brick wall, and can't even concentrate on anything anymore.

In the evening we went to Mum and Dad's. It was a great fun night. Not having seen my brother since Christmas, it was awesome to spend the evening with him, Dee and the girls. We shared a yummy dinner and lots of laughs. The kids had a great time, although were very weary. We came home around 9.30pm and the kids were happy to go to bed. Mickey's eyes were red he was that tired.

I went to bed after 10, optimistic for a good night, seeing as I'd not napped in the afternoon and I was very very tired. I'd downloaded a sleep app from iTunes............and listened to it 5 times during the course of bed time to 2.50am. By 4.30am I got up and browsed the web. The netski is surprisingly speedy at that hour of the morning!! I took advantage of the off peak download time, seeing as I'm currently over my percentage of use, compared to days passed, and an hour later, I felt snoozy and headed back to bed. For the next three hours, I actually slept!

After a cereal for breaky, I cleaned, tidied, and made a yummy Lemon Slice with Sammy and Billy-Joe while Mickey helped Daddy outside in the yard.

At 12.30pm Mum and Dad arrived and it was drinks all round and some light nibblies. Lunch was a BBQ. We had marinaded pork ribs, marinaded chicken skewers and snagglepusses. I made a crunchy noodle salad and Mum brought her delicious coleslaw that we all love.

We ate lunch late, true to our usual form, and whiled away the afternoon enjoying each others' company. The Easter Bunny brought eggs in the afternoon and the kids enjoyed hunting for them. I'll upload photos from today on another day. I really should go to bed and try to get some sleep.

My gorgeous boys and my two beautiful girls. They're my nieces and not my daughters but they're the closest I have to daughters and I love them to bits.

Julia and Kiana trying to show that Billy-Joe is taller than they are, even though they both tower over him lol......

Me with my gorgeous nieces.