I've lost my joie de vivre

I have none at all at the moment. The only joy I have is just being with my friends or loved ones. There's no energy left for anything else. I can't exercise, I can't read for long, I don't want to visit anyone, I can't create. I just do the bare minimum. I get up, shower, look after my family, clean, wash, and then am just happy to find my recliner and I sigh when I recline. I'm just exhausted, then I get up again later to cook and look for my bed earlier than what's usual for me. I take my daily vitamins, I had been taking echinacea and zinc tabs, but nothing really helps. If I don't feel any better on Monday, I will go to the doctor.

This morning, I promised to go and watch the kids at golf. I arrived an hour after them, giving myself a little more time in bed. I know on a Friday night, I should come home at a sensible hour, but it's a big highlight of my week, and I don't want it to end. I took my stuff last night, but needn't have bothered. It was 9.20pm before I sat down to scrap. Karen, Barbi and I, had caught up, and shared a bottle of wine. I crave for my time with Karen, and I'd enjoyed some quiet time with Barbi before everyone had arrived. We ate together, still wary of the Thai, so we had KFC instead. Later Karen and I did the frappe run. Scrumptious! I pottered on Barbi's computer, tidying up some things for her. The main object was to fix a problem with her antivirus program. In the end I couldn't fix it. I was sorry I couldn't fix it for her. I am so glad those kids of issues are no longer problems for me. When I buy a laptop later in the year, I won't have any qualms buying a mac, even though they're so much dearer that PCs.

I was home in bed by about 1.20am. Not early enough on a normal night, let alone a night I'm feeling like crap. I headed out to the golf course still and video camera in hand. I only grabbed the SLR at the last minute. Lucky I did because the video camera was as dead as a dodo bird. I got some okay shots. Next time I'll take my zoom I think. Much easier photographing golfers than footballers lol...... The kids enjoyed themselves although Sammy struggled. I'd asked Peter to have a quiet word with the instructor which he did today. I wanted him to know that Sammy needs constant reminders to refocus. The poor little mite, my heart aches for him watching him in these types of situations, and yet I know that it does him good to be exposed to different things. I watch Mickey, 8 years old and full of confidence, a far cry from the intrepid uncertainty and fear of failure and lack of confidence which his 9 year old brother displays. Next week, we'll leave Mickey and Billy-Joe to play the nine holes afterwards.

We discovered after we got home, that Sammy wasn't feeling well either.

I snoozed for three hours, I've just got up. Sammy has been lying down the entire time too. It's a very quiet household today. Peter is downstairs listening to the nags with his mate, Billy-Joe is upstairs too.

Saturday night is 'date night' with my husband. I am going to cook a green curry. It takes a little effort, but just tastes far better than any Thai I've eaten in an Australian restaurant, so it will make our night special. It will be a nice evening to just be together. The kids can go to bed early tonight.

I'll read some blogs, ichat Karen, then I'll upload some photos I took from today.