Well it's happened.........

Well it's absolutely amazing how one's life can go sometimes. Out of the last two weeks I have spent four days working as a relief teacher. I am amazed on many different levels.

* I am enjoying it heaps
* I can actually still do it
* It doesn't feel like ten years since I was last in front of the classroom
* The kids like me
* I can still cope at home
* I am not exhausted

Then this morning, the principal rang and asked me if I would be available for about three or four weeks next term, with the possibility of a contract for the whole term. I am really excited!!! Can you believe it? I am a teacher lol............. Somewhere in my dim, dark, previous life, I actually went to university!!! I have to pinch myself that I am actually a teacher, someone who is trained to plan, teach and evaluate, someone who is capable of earning good money, someone my dh and kids are really proud of. I bless the day that my dh, then very new boyfriend, encouraged me to do my degree. I was a mature aged student at the time, and university was a far cry from my life prior to then. We always said that it would be a good profession to get into, especially if we were to have children.

I am sitting here writing this with a very light and happy heart. I am so proud of myself. This has given my confidence an awesome boost...........

I find out on Monday, the exact details of my time at the school......

Still Going.

I am now in my seventh week of No count. I am still doing really well. I am enjoying how I am feeling. I love the food, so there's no drama there. Not having to count every single morsel that enters my mouth is so liberating. I can have a couple (not many) treats over the weekend, so I choose them very wisely.

I have a couple of challenges coming up in the next couple of weeks. Db is getting remarried on the weekend, and then dh's parents are celebrating their 50th Wedding Anniversary in another two weeks time. I will eat and choose wisely, and not drink too much either.

I know I can do this.........I am in for the long haul. I was wearing some shorts yesterday that I bought before Christmas. They were on special and were too tight. I knew that I would lose weight and they would fit..........well............they are too big now, I am always hitching them up................gosh that's a fabulous feeling. At another time, I bought singlet top which was bit tight, I wouldn't wear it when I first bougth it home, I felt like the michelin man in the top, too many lumps happening on my back...........!!! Now the top looks great.......

I love spending time on the WW forums, some great people there, and it's very comforting knowing there are others doing the same journey as I am.........

Look forward to weigh in on Wednesday as I haven't weighed in for two weeks, because of Sammy being sick last week..........

My first day

Well what a day! As luck would have it, the day that I had an organized volunteer day was also the day that Tracer called, and I would have had a paid teaching day. Nevertheless, I was really taken with everything at the Special School. I learnt so much on my first day. The setup there is fantastic, they are well resourced, it's clean, well organized and has the loveliest people working there. The teachers that I dealt with today, was just the most pleasant and amazing people. The work they do is great, their dedication to the kids is inspiring. I'd love to be like them one day. I think I did really well today, nothing that happened today repulsed or shocked me. I was well prepared mentally, and for that I thank the power of prayer, and my own ability to adapt to new situations.

I worked in three different areas. I also had the privilege of working with young kids and then with teenagers. All were different, but also very similar too, as their needs are all the same basic and fundamental needs of us humans. Caring for these individuals is a huge part of the job, and I that appeals to the part of me that always wanted to be a nurse.

I can't wait to do more volunteer days there, and I definitely am looking forward to doing a supply day there.......

Melbourne

Melbourne
Originally uploaded by Jazzmin2912.

A new stage in my life begins.......

Tomorrow I spend a day at the Special School as a volunteer. I have taken this on with the view of being considered as a relief teacher in the school. I am very nervous and also very excited. Last week I bought some 'Rescue Remedy' because Mickey still carries on like a banshee everytime I drop him off at preschool, so I thought a couple of drops of this would make him feel a little less anxious......hasn't worked yet!!!! Maybe I might take a hip flask with some in for me tomorrow lol.............too funny...............

I know I can do this, and I know I can be good at this............I know I can do this, and I know I can be good at this...................... wonder how many times I need to say that to actually believe it lol...............

Victoria Market 2

Victoria Market 2
Originally uploaded by Jazzmin2912.

I could have spent hours and hours here, and spent alot of money. The food was a highlight for me.......oh how I miss the variety of food here.........

Victoria Market

Victoria Market
Originally uploaded by Jazzmin2912.

My Three boys

My Three boys, originally uploaded by Jazzmin2912.

I was so sick this last Christmas. I am really happy that I have any decent photos at all. I guess when you take a gazillion, you got to get the odd good photo, even if it's only snapshot quality like this one. cute photo though, as it really depcicts their personalities.

Melbourne

Melbourne, originally uploaded by Jazzmin2912.

This was our first full day of our holiday. I so badly wanted to visit the markets again. My only regret is not buying more things. I could have bought myself a new pair of ugh boots, as my current pair were purchased from here twenty years ago. I of course at a souvlakia...............delicious!!!

Long time no see...........
I am slack aren't I? I really should spend more time writing in my blog. I enjoy reading those of others, but sometimes struggle with exactly how much info I want to publish in mine.

I am currently on my sixth week of Weight Watching. I am following the No Count programme, which I am really enjoying. I am never hungry, something I always felt on the points system. It suits the way I like to eat much better. To date I have lost 2.5kg, not huge amounts, but I am losing every week, something which I don't normally do so I am happy about that. Last weekend we had a scrapbooking retreat, it's usually a food disaster, but I continued with my No Count, and resisted all the temptations.

I am feeling really tired this week, I feel like all I want to do is sleep. I have alot on my mind too which doesn't help.

I have recently re-activated my teaching status, so I can do supply teaching. I am finding this really stressful, because I haven't been called in yet. In the mornings I feel so tired, worry about being called in, and, then later in the day, am sorry I didn't get called in. In all honesty I didn't think I would get called in until second term, as that's when everyone gets sick. But on the other hand, I am hoping they don't forget me.......... Later this week I intend to visit some more schools, probably add Mapleton to my list. I have also contacted Cath Ed, with the view of getting into the Catholic school system.

Stay tuned, for more frequent entries.......hope to upload some of my layouts too.

Jenny

Going to re-commit.........again!!!

I have decided, after the last few months of eating too many goodies, that in the New Year, I am going back to WW. I have just had the weekend where I have eaten a few non healthy items, and, even though I didn't eat too much, I felt like crap. I couldn't believe that my stomach could feel so bad after eating the wrong things. Today I have gone back to whole grain bread, and will eat steak and yummy vegies for dinner. The new WW program sounds intersting, I know I will succeed this time.

Look forward to learning all about the new program.

Beautiful flower

Beautiful flower
Originally uploaded by Jazzmin.

I have always loved sunflowers. Ever since I was a child, and saw the huge fields of these magnficent flowers all facing and following the sun. I have tried to grow them without great success. This one is beautiful, although, not as large as I was hoping it would become. I love their huge, yellow brilliance.

Hand feeding the chooks

Handfeeding the chooks
Originally uploaded by Jazzmin.

The chooks belong to next door. The kids just love them. The chooks are totally free, and enjoy coming over into our yard. Sammy in particular has a real affection for the chooks. They handfeed them, call them, and even pick them up and give them a cuddle. I love this photo of Sammy,Caleb and Mickey.

I love the colours and composition of this photo.

Onkel Vikki in memorium

Onkel Vikki in memorium
Originally uploaded by Jazzmin.

I was so lucky to have spent Easter with my Uncle. I love this photograph!

Sad days.............

I am all cried out! My eyes hurt, I feel like I have a cold, I am tired, oh so tired.............. I got an email from Dad which I opened Sunday afternoon, to tell me that my Uncle Vikki had died............. I was stunned, shocked and felt sick! The details are still sketchy, as I am only in email contact with my Dad, and he is understandably devastated. I gathered that they went to a tourist attraction, and walked, and my Uncle had a massive heart attack. My Dad and others tried reviving him, but to no avail. I gather he died at the spot, never making it to hospital. My Dad also needed treatment in the ambulance..............the shock and the trauma combined with his own health condition, was all too much. Yesterday I lit a candle in memorium for my Uncle - I won't have a funeral to go to, only my own grief.....................

Ricky is coming to visit on Thursday night, so we will have a drink for our Uncle. My life has been truly blessed with little tragedy................and this is a tragedy, something you can never be ready for, something you can never explain to another, something which hurts so deeply.

My parents went overseas to spend time with family, and now they are organizing my Uncle's effects................

Above Purlingbrook Falls

Above Purlingbrook Falls
Originally uploaded by Jazzmin.

This weekend, we were away and I actually found this spot in the shade. I have been wanting to try this techniqe for so long, and I am happy with the effect although I can't wait to try it with a ND filter some time down the track.

Feeling of deja vu

I have just finished reading another girl's blog - I was astounded because it was like I was reading about myself in about 1986. I remember when I was left alone for two weeks at a time, I really struggled. I cried every single night. I panicked about having the put petrol in the car just like this girl is, and I had a company car where I got the fuel for free. I ended up getting one of the other guys to put the fuel in for me. I was petrified about driving myself everywhere, I had no kids and was incredibly lonely..............

I feel for her, and I know that it was so stupid feeling like that. It wouldn't worry me as much anymore. I would miss dh yes..........but I would cope okay, especially once the kids were tucked in bed for the night..........

I have come a long, long way in nearly twenty years........... I will never lose my independence.............ever!!!!

Mama never told me there'd be days like these...........

I have had a wierd kind of day. The kind of day that I used to have alot of once.. The type of day when you don't want to get out of bed, and the 'to do list' is a mile long, and you feel lethargic and heavy as you drag yourself around doing your chores. I used to have days like this all the time, when my depression was untreated, and in the early days of treatment before the dosage of meds was right. The good thing nowadays is, that I know it will pass, I know there is an end to my mood, that it doesn't last very long any more............ Still knocks me for six when it happens though. I have to push myself to complete even the most simplest of tasks. I think back to the days when I am jumping out of my skin, flying through my chores, enjoying my exercise and I think of how today, I feel like I couldn't even walk out of sight on a dark night, let alone a brisk 4 km walk. I have work to do, and I am behind. I know in my heart that I function better knowing I have things to do.........I know I get bored so very easily, but it's still hard to drag myself through the day. It's evening now, and I do feel a bit better. Tomorrow is a new day.............

Using Robin Purcells B&W action

Using Robin Purcells B&W action
Originally uploaded by Jazzmin.

I think the other photo makes Billy-Joe and I look a bit hard. This conversion was done using Robin Purcell's action in Photoshop 7. It has a bluish tinge to it, but I quite like it.............

There is just so much to try and to learn.

A rare, quiet moment.

rarequietmoment
Originally uploaded by Jazzmin.

Life is so noisy in this household with three boisterous boys. My photos offer me very therapeutic moments, far beyond just the appreciation of photography as an art form. I can look over images, and remember the quiet moments. They are there.............just few and far between.